Mom First

89: Are You in the Right Job? Ask Yourself this Question.

April 04, 2023 Jen Larimore
Mom First
89: Are You in the Right Job? Ask Yourself this Question.
Show Notes Transcript

Do you like your job? Are you in the right job? Here's how to know if you are in the right job, right now! Look at your boss and ask yourself how you would feel if YOU had their job. 


  • How they are doing? 
  • What they work on and their workload? 
  • What are the values your supervisor actually demonstrates?

Do you want that life? This is about values--YOUR VALUES, specifically. This question can help you figure out whether your job is in line with your current values. 

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Copyright 2023, by Spectacle Coaching, LLC, Empowering Spectacle-Making Eve...

89: Are You in the Right Job? Ask Yourself this Question. 


[00:00:00] Ever wonder if you're in the right job. Today, I'm sharing with you. The one question that you need to ask to find out. Are you ready? Take a breath. Let's go. 


[00:00:50] Hello, my friends. Welcome to mom first. I'm so glad you're here. It is the start of spring. And spring means new beginnings. Doesn't it. [00:01:00] It's definitely the vibe that is showing up for me right now. 

[00:01:04] In the last week I busted through some major blacks that I've been having. I've gotten tons of clarity on my business. And even a bit on this podcast. I'm excited to use this podcast as a way to live into my values around connection and growth. 

[00:01:23] In keeping with that. I want to share with you a podcast. I absolutely love. 

[00:01:28] It's called tales. She told me by Farah Hadar Farrah is actually going to be featured as a guest in an upcoming episode here of mom first. And I would love for you to check out her podcast, which is seriously so good. 

[00:01:43] she features super authentic, honest, intimate conversations with other women about what it really means to be a woman, a mom, and a business leader. 

[00:01:52] I first connected with Farrah in 2022. And she is one of those people who has a gift for making [00:02:00] you feel seen. And elevating the conversation at the same time. 

[00:02:04] For me. She's a bit of a mentor and I know you'll appreciate her work. So please be sure to check her out and throw her and her podcast. Some love. You can find her on the tails. She told me podcast. As well as Instagram at Farrah Hadar. 

[00:02:22] Okay. My friends here is what I have for you today. Mom first is all about empowering each other. To show up and create the lives that we really truly want for ourselves. And for our families. The ones that feel aligned. The ones that really resonate with our values and our purpose. And let's be honest. 

[00:02:45] Work. Our jobs. They play a huge part in our lives. A common theme that has been coming up for the folks that I work with lately is are they in the right job? Did they choose the right occupation? [00:03:00] Are they working at the right place? Look, I've been there. I have definitely been there at points. 

[00:03:07] And today I'm going to share with you the one question that you need to ask yourself. To really know if you are in the right job. 

[00:03:16] Now. As you've often heard me say, this is a come as you are podcast. That means wherever you are right now on your journey. You're welcome. You are welcome here. Just as you are right now in this moment. You're welcome, whether you love your job. Whether you hate it or whether you're not sure how you feel about it. 

[00:03:40] All of those and everything in between them. They're all valid, all valid feelings. You're welcome whether you feel lost or in the flow. So come with me. Throw that hair up in a messy, not. Forget about the laundry that needs to be folded and all the emails that [00:04:00] need to be returned. And let's get started on building the life that you want for your family. 

[00:04:07] For you and for your community. Here at mom first, you're appreciated for who you are in this moment. And for the woman that you're becoming too. So, what does that mean when it comes to your job? Your big old J O B. Here's how you can tell if you're in the right job for yourself right now. Look at your supervisor. 

[00:04:31] How would you feel if you were that person? 

[00:04:35] If you had that person's work goals. Their workload. Their values, their life outside of work. Their hobbies, their family time, their passions. Would you want to be like them? On any level. 

[00:04:51] Do you want. Their level of competence, their level of commitment. Their level of free time. 

[00:04:58] When you think about [00:05:00] how they live their life, how do you feel. Does it feel like something you would want to run toward? Or run from. 

[00:05:09] When you think of who they are as a person. Their values. Their integrity. Do you want to be like them? I'm not talking about the kind of car they drive or how big their houses or what kind of vacations they have. 

[00:05:24] I'm talking about, do you respect them as a person for who they really are? For their values. And do you want to emulate them in any way? 

[00:05:35] Now that doesn't mean that you have to have the exact same values or beliefs. But just when you look at them, Do you get a sense? That if you were them and in their shoes, you would be headed in the right direction. By your standards. 

[00:05:53] If you aren't sure. Then look a little bit further up the org chart. Look at your supervisor, [00:06:00] supervisor, ask yourself those same questions. How would you feel if you had that person's life? Does it resonate with you? Or do you kind of feel like gay gambit when you think about it? 

[00:06:11] Be honest with yourself here because of the hard, uncomfortable truth. Is that if you are listening, To this podcast episode. With the title. Are you in the right job? The one question you need to ask yourself right now. 

[00:06:29] Chances are that you're not entirely happy and content with exactly where you're at. Maybe your job is okay for now. Maybe it's fine. Maybe it's toxic and draining and you should have left last year. Maybe you're finding yourself performing well exceeding expectations. 

[00:06:46] But wondering. What the future could possibly hold in terms of growth. Here's how you figure out what to do. You look at the people around you. Higher up on the org chart and you ask [00:07:00] yourself. Would you want to trade jobs with them? Would you want to be them? When you think of their life in broad strokes, does it resonate with you? 

[00:07:09] Do you appreciate the values that they emulate in their life? Not the values necessarily that they aspire to on paper. But the values that actually show up. If you aren't sure about some of this. Ask them. Ask them, what they like about work. Listen. Listen to what they gripe about. Ask how their weekend was. 

[00:07:34] Does it sound like a weekend you would want. Did they spend the whole weekend at the office and not see their family. And are they happy with that? Would that be what you want? Find out what they do to handle their stress. Are they muddling through? Do they take it out on their family? I once worked for a law partner. 

[00:07:55] Who would pretty much slam his door at the end of the day. Fume in traffic [00:08:00] all the way home. And then regularly yell at his kids. I knew this. Because I heard him talking about it one day. Saying how he holds it all together at work, but then slips up in his harsher with his kids and he means to be. 

[00:08:14] And I regularly work with coaching clients who are so drained by work, that they cannot possibly show up as the mom or dad that they want to be at home. Now I'm not judging them for this. Not at all. I get it because it is really, really hard when work is really stressful. I know that I have. So been there. 

[00:08:38] I've so been there. But keeping it together all day. Just to go home and yell at the people that we care about the most. That is not a flax. That's not a life I want. I want something different. 

[00:08:56] And so to connect the dots, if you're trying to figure out if you're in [00:09:00] the right job, And you look at the people around you. You look at your supervisor and their supervisor, and that's what you're supposed to aspire to. And you look at their lives and you say, oh my gosh, like, I don't want that. 

[00:09:12] Then it's time to start figuring out what it is that you do want and what steps you're going to take. 

[00:09:19] Because if you continue. On the track that's laid out for you. Without having any intentionality and awareness and you just go on default. Then you're going to end up. One year five year, 10 years, 20 years down the road. And you're not going to have been where you have want to go. 

[00:09:38] Now there are three ways that you'll be able to answer this question. 

[00:09:43] So really, truly ask yourself. How would you feel if you were your supervisor? There are three ways to answer this question. The first is fabulous. You'd feel fabulous if you had that person's job. If you had their life, if you were them. 

[00:09:59] You [00:10:00] want to be in emulate? What your supervisor is throwing down each day. You have a supervisor whose job you would love to have and who is leading with the values that you aspire to. If that person is succeeding. Then chances are, there's a path there for you too. At least in the short run.

[00:10:20] In this scenario, all the data points are telling you that you're probably in the right place right now. And that when you're ready, you can start asking for those growth opportunities. The second answer though, is a bit more tentative. You think you would feel good if you had that job? If you had that life? 

[00:10:39] But there are some tweaks. Tweaks, you might need to make. There are parts of your boss's work in life that really resonate and appeal to see your supervisor as an example that you could emulate with some small tweaks. Maybe you'd take a slightly different approach in terms of work-life balance. 

[00:10:57] Or in terms of how you make [00:11:00] decisions. But overall, there are no red flags. No alarms, no severe dissonance that suggests that something is wildly out of alignment with who you want to be. 

[00:11:10] If that's you. Here's what you can do. You keep on track. And you hone in further on your own values and what's important to you. You continue to ask yourself that question. How would you feel if you were your supervisor? And then you look for those opportunities to test, to see if you could bring your position, your work into further alignment with what you actually want. 

[00:11:36] Or if you could find or create a position within the company, that would be closer. To what you actually want. 

[00:11:43] You have to know your values for this to work. You have to know what really actually matters to you. 

[00:11:49] And sometimes if we aren't sure of what our values are, it helps to look around at others and consider, Hey, what do we admire about how that person is approaching their life or their [00:12:00] work? 

[00:12:00] What would we want to emulate? What don't we want? And when we answer those kinds of questions, we can start to look at the values that underlie our answer. 

[00:12:11] The third possible answer that you might get to the question of how you would feel if you had your supervisor's position. Is horrible. 

[00:12:21] If you get that answer. Then my friends. The data is telling you. It's time to look at options. It's time to look for opportunities. But what opportunities you ask? Well, That depends on what caused you to say. Absolutely not. To what your supervisor has going on. 

[00:12:42] Was it the work, was it the pay? Was it the responsibilities? Was it how they're doing their work. Was it the rest of their life that was so impacted by how they're doing their work that you could not ever possibly want that kind of life. What is making you say. Thanks. But no, [00:13:00] thanks. What's causing you to hit the pause button right now. 

[00:13:03] Or maybe even the ejac button. And what is the value that underlies that answer? 

[00:13:11] If you want a free values exercise that can help you get to the bottom of some of this. And figuring out what is actually really most important to you. Then Damion Instagram at mom, first coaching. 

[00:13:23] Send me the message values, and I will hook you up with a complementary exercise. That's going to help you to take this work deeper. Now, when I say it's time to look for opportunities. It doesn't mean you have to leave right now. Maybe you look for a different job. Maybe you look at some other options. 

[00:13:41] Maybe you get some key things in place first. Maybe you find a way to build that dream business that you've always wanted. Or get the side hustle going. But you take what you're learning from looking at your supervisors life. Get real with what your values are and then you [00:14:00] start creating your life from that space. 

[00:14:03] This is how you can lead in your life. This is how you create your dream. This is how you make a life that works for you, for your family and for your community. 

[00:14:16] If you want more support doing this? Then hop over to mom, first coaching on Instagram. DME the word value. And I'll send you that free values exercise that I'm talking about. 

[00:14:28] Okay. My friends. Thank you for listening to this episode. In case no one has told you today, you are amazing just as you are right now in this moment. I see you, I believe in you. And I want you to know that you matter. So much. I'll see you next time. 

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