Mom First

93: Reinventing Yourself: A Roadmap for Lawyer Moms Seeking Passionate and Rewarding Careers

May 16, 2023 Jen Larimore, JD
Mom First
93: Reinventing Yourself: A Roadmap for Lawyer Moms Seeking Passionate and Rewarding Careers
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Feeling stuck and overwhelmed as a lawyer mom? Discover how to unlock your inner passions and align them with your career choices in this empowering episode! We share two powerful exercises that will help you uncover the answers within yourself, paving the way for a fulfilling and rewarding career change. We also discuss Maslow's theory of self-actualization and its vital role in helping you become the person you want to be.

Don't navigate this journey alone! Connect with a supportive community of fellow lawyer moms on Instagram at momfirstcoaching, where we continue the conversation and offer guidance during these challenging times of transition. Together, we can overcome our fears, unlock our creativity, and nurture the amazing potential within each of us. Join us and reimagine your career trajectory for a happier and more satisfying life!

Unlock your creativity! Nurture that Spark!

Mom First inspires lawyer moms to make space for their own creativity and passions! When you nurture your creative spark, you become a better mom and even a better lawyer. Plus, it FEELS SOOOOO GOOD!

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Now "Mom First," formerly "Quite the Spectacle"

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Copyright 2023, by Spectacle Coaching, LLC, Empowering Spectacle-Making Eve...

This episode is less than 15 minutes long and I’m sharing with you 2 exercises that will help you figure out what to do next when you realize you are ready to leave your current lawyer job. Let’s get you unstuck and moving forward. 

How to know what to do next when you want to leave the law but are stuck

Hello my friends. I’m so glad you are here. 

Let me ask you, does any of this sounds familiar: 

–I’m sick of my job. Why did I become a lawyer? 

–I don’t think I can make it through another month or another case without losing my mind. 

–If I have to write one more summary judgment motion, I’m going to scream.

–I cannot spend another afternoon doing this mindless document review. 

–Is this really what I went to law school for? 

–I just don’t think I can be lawyer and mom that I want to be. 

–I’m so OVER the law. 

In the last 2 months, all of these statements–or some version thereof–came up in coaching sessions with my clients. 

And once they get that out… the next line of coaching questions seem to lead to but “What should I do next.” 

I want to talk to you about that question today, because its an important one. It can feel heavy and foggy. It can feel light and airy. Its a question that signals a fork in the road. And it often comes up right before a client is going to go through a transformation. 

Here’s the thing, the women I work with are super smart, brilliant, ridiculously capable, and often highly analytical. And when they are ready to make a change and leave the law firm life behind–they don’t make that decision lightly. They have probably made a dozen lists about all their options. They’ve thoroughly weighed the pros and cons of each of those options.

They spend a lot of time getting insight from others. Seeking out mentors. Asking for advice. Reading books on what to do. Speaking with everyone from their financial advisor to their mail carrier–all in an effort to get to the right answer. 

They even look to the googles, and start asking, what should I do with my law degree?  

But they don’t actually move forward, because they don’t know what to do next. They are STUCK. 

And sometimes that continues for days, weeks, months, even years… 

But here’s what I know, that answer is not outside of you. You’re never going to find it if you keep looking to others for the answer. 

Only you can answer that question. 

Let’s talk about how to do that. 

Ultimately, the question, “What should I do next” is one of self-actualization. 

You’ve probably heard of Maslow’s Theory of Self Actualization. Self-actualization is the ability to become the best version of oneself. And when it comes down to it, that’s what we are trying to get at it when we are tired of where we are now–whether its at work, or at home–and we are trying to figure out what to do next. According to Maslow, the tendency toward self actualization, can be phrased as the desire to become more and more what one is, to become everything that one is capable of becoming. 

What comes up for you if you think of who you want to become? 

Because that’s can and should inform what you should do next. 

Ultimately, this is about who you want to become. 

When you don’t know who you want to become though, you can feel lost and alone. Like your lost in a fog. Or maybe in turbulent waters, and you don’t know what way to go. 

Its in those moments, that it can be so helpful to imagine a light house. 

That lighthouse is who you want to become. Maybe its far off in the distance and maybe its nearby. 

But the key–when it comes to what to do next–is to always be moving toward the light. 

So, if you are unhappy at work, and you don’t know what to do next, imagine what it would feel like to be doing something different. TO be doing something you love. TO be doing something where you feel appreciated and like you’re making a difference. To be doing something where you can show up as the professional and the mom that you want to be. What’s that feel like to you? 

Now hang on to that feeling… 

And look at the list of options that you have made–because I know you have a list of options somewhere. 

WHen you look at that list.. Which one feels the most like you are moving toward the light? 

–Maybe its turning in your notice right now? 

–Maybe its starting a side hustle? 

–Maybe its positioning yourself to start your own firm–one that’s aligned with your values. 

–Maybe its exploring roles in house or in government. 

Just keep asking yourself, which one feels the most like you are moving toward the light. 

If you are really stuck, and this isn’t resonating, then you can explore this further and navigate these tricky waters by seeking out the wisdom of your future self. Go all the way to the end of your life. What does that future self want you to have created in your life? What mattered most to her? What was she glad she did? What does she wish she had given up earlier? And then when she gives you the answer, you can ask yourself, okay, what’s the next right step to move toward that. What can I do today that would honor that answer. 

Okay my friends. Wherever you are on your journey. Know that you are welcome here. You are appreciated. You are okay. And everything is going to be okay. You are enough as you are right now and so is this moment. This work is hard. Its challenging. It requires us to reflect on what we really want and what we want to create in this world. And a lot of time, that brings up our internal judge and our internal saboteurs, including the parts of ourselves that are hyper rational, hyper vigilant, and hyper achieving. If you want to have a self-actualized life, you need to find a way to quiet those parts of yourself and really listen to what your truest essence wants. And that’s why this process of using the lighthouse or the future self can be so helpful. 

If you need help with any of this, you know I’m here to help. Find me over on Instagram @momfirstcoaching, and I’ll be happy to chat further. Until then, I will see you next time. 

Lawyer Mom Career Transitions
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